Ladybugs, profound conversation, breastfeeding, Grandpa time

Today has felt like the weekend, because Ted is home to spend time with his dad, who is visiting. And because we had no specific plans (beyond taking the car in to get the window fixed), it has felt very relaxed, a long day in the good sense.

This afternoon we released the ladybugs I bought at the nursery I went to several days ago. They’ve been hibernating in the fridge, and on the advice of the nursery staff we sprayed them with sugar water to temporarily glue their wings shut so they wouldn’t all immediately fly away. One lesson we learned: if we do this again, we need to release them on the side of our garden closest to the porch so that when they spread out, crawling, they don’t wind up on the sidewalk where they can be stepped on. Another lesson: whomever is present for the release will acquire ladybug passengers in hair, on clothes, etc. Despite a certain amount of vigilance, a few of them arrived at the restaurant where we had dinner this evening. We took them outside. I hope that at least some of them will call our garden home for a while, eating the aphids which like to eat our roses. It was a fun experiment. Depending upon its success, we may do it again in a few weeks. We shall see.

At the end of our dinner, Ted and his dad and the kids went back home. I stayed, and my friend L came to pick me up. We have a history of fantastic conversations, but this evening’s hit a high for us, being thorough, open, wide-ranging, thought-provoking, and energizing. Among other things, we talked about children, and the ways in which parenting presents opportunities for learning and healing. L is able to see and to reflect back to me things that are difficult for me to perceive or believe. In conversation with her I am often able to get to compassion and clarity, for/with myself and others, to a deeper level and beautifully efficiently, which I can then sustain in my life, having connected effectively to it during our talk.

I am so fortunate to have wonderful friends.

Today when Ted and I were doing naptime with the twins Emily asked to nurse for the first time in a couple weeks. “Nurse? Nurse?” I got her and Joanna situated on the big pillow, and they both nursed for a while, until they were asleep. Breastfeeding is one of those things that could easily be perceived to be draining (literally) energetically or emotionally. That has not been my experience. For me it has been centering, fulfilling, bonding, peaceful (minus the physical discomfort at times), renewing. I am so profoundly grateful that they wanted to do it this afternoon. This may or may not be the last time. I won’t go back to taking Fenugreek to keep my milk supply up: I will just happily offer when/if they ask again. But having the chance to connect in that way again after I thought it was finished, to consciously cherish it while it was happening, is a great gift. I hope I can always remember the picture of Emily’s hand resting on me, her lashes on her cheeks, the peace and contentment in her face and in my heart.

Another wonderful thing that has been happening today, off and on throughout the day, is Grandpa G reading to Hazel. I love seeing the two of them close together as he reads and she listens to a book. It really warms my heart.

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