First words, twins’ playing, family, relationships

Emily has started saying, “Yeah!” and “No”. She says them communicatively, and so it is possible to ask her a question and get an accurate verbal response. This is amazing, staggering, life-changing. It is also so new that it takes me by surprise. I am so used to talking to the twins, doing it automatically, narrating our day and asking them what they want. I am not used to hearing a little voice answer in the affirmative or negative when I say, “Do you want to read another book?” (Though that particular question is always answered with an enthusiastic, “Yeah!” They love books.)

The twins have also started playing around and rough housing with each other more. Just this evening Emily was sitting on top of Joanna and bouncing up and down, and they were both giggling madly. Along with that has come hair pulling, tugging on clothing, and pushing, as well as hitting each other in the head with whatever object is convenient. Today Joanna got a good handful of Emily’s hair and tugged hard. Emily cried. However, they are holding hands more now, and hugging more too. What a fantastic relationship, and such a privilege and joy to watch it develop.

My sister and niece are coming over tomorrow. My nanny is here for a few hours, and so my sister and I are going to go off to the spa and have some time together while the cousins play. I am really looking forward to that, and so is Hazel. Today her piano teacher asked her who her best friend was (she’s playing a piece called, “Best Friends”). She said her cousin’s name with no hesitation at all.

Today Ted and I had a pretty intense joint therapy session. A nugget from it is the importance of cultivating good will, as well as assuming it on the part of one’s partner. When we’re feeling overstretched, we sometimes fall into the trap of competing, both for Biggest (Most Pathetic) Martyr, and for the resources we feel to be thin on the ground, notably downtime.

So that’ll be my mental byline for a while: Assume Good Will.


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