I worked on the Elgar Cello Concerto when I was in high school. I wouldn’t say I ever completely nailed it. Certainly, I didn’t get the second movement up to its (very fast!) marking of 160. I have decided that I want to relearn it, and get it all this time. I took it with me when I went to work this afternoon, and worked on it in my breaks, starting with the second movement. Some things feel familiar. I can tell that I’m a more accomplished musician than I was all those years ago, because there are things that felt like insurmountable challenges then that I can do now. Part of that, of course, is that I have more patience now, and more confidence. I know that, with time and effort, I’ll be able to get it all in my fingers. I’m enjoying the challenge.
Today our nanny worked her new shift, which starts and ends later so that Ted can have his night off on the same night I work late, therefore freeing him up to be home on Mondays, when I’m also here. We get very little time all together as a family, and wanted to maximize that. Hazel’s in school Thursday mornings, so I got a morning alone with my babies. That was lovely. I am glad that I’ll have that to look forward to once a week. I can nurse them, feed them, take them for walks, play with them, and revel in their marvelous, open, curious, affectionate little baby selves without having to share them with anyone else. I am so happy that Hazel loves them, but she never wants to let me interact with them. She sticks herself in between them and me and demands their attention, particularly if she sees me noticing them or hears me saying anything about them. So, we work on that. It’s a learning process. And it helped me to really appreciate the time with them today. I put their high chairs next to each other when I was feeding them breakfast. I looked over from food preparation at the counter to see that they were holding hands. Sweet doesn’t cover it. Dolcissimo conveys it better, with the richness that is part of the definition of that word. The other day I said to Ted that hearing someone call their baby an angel always used to make me want to roll my eyes or take some antacid, and that the heavy irony does not escape me that now I sometimes want to call mine angels. I am amused as I get older by the many instances in which I’ve had a serious shift even to the extent of an about-face in my feelings, attitudes, or opinions.
We’ve figured out what we’re going to do about the family bike. We’re going to buy a trailer and an electric assist for my current bike. This will allow me to transport either the twins or Hazel with my Townie Electra, on which I am reasonably comfortable. We’ll have a year to get used to riding, during which the babies will be in a trailer that can provide protection from the elements, and then when they’re two years old we can get a cargo bike. Then we’ll have two bikes with electric assist and can ride together as a family. Since Ted and I are almost the same height we can share both the Townie and the new bike when we get it. I’m pleased with this compromise. We also need to work on the best solution for storage, but we have some ideas about that. I’m looking forward to riding!
Right now the twins are sitting together, looking at each other and cooing and squawking. It is so fun to see their developing interactions. They’re going to be eleven months soon!